Watch: Rav Chaim Kanievsky is Asked What “Normal” Means in Shidduchim




  1. Please translate for those who do not understand. (A literal translation with nothing other then exactly what was said, asked and answered. Thank you

  2. There is a gemara that states that you need to look into the brothers of a potential shiduch before marrying her. The boy asked what exactly we need to look into. Rav Chaim responded “that he is normal”. The boy asked what that means. How do we know if he is normal? Rav Chaim responded “if he knows how to learn.” The boy then asked what if she has two brothers of which one is normal and the other is not? To which rav chaim laughed while saying “then half the woman is good and half is not good!”
    The boy then asks “so (under those circumstances) not to approach such a shidduch?” To which rav Chaim says “only half”.
    The boy laughs and then asks for a bracha.
    Rav Chaim responds “baruch shepetarani” which is the bracha we make when our son is bar mitzvahd. The meaning of the baracha is that the father thanks Hashem that he is no longer held accountable for the punishments due to the son. Basically Rav Chaim made a blessing that he was no longer responsible to speak to him. All in good humor.

  3. What I cant understand how someone can go into the gadol hador who every second is kol kuloi torah and waist his time with Leitzonos!!!!!!!

  4. Listen,
    What do you want from the guy? He paid his way through the gabbaim to speak to him. Let him get his money’s worth.

  5. Here we see the by-product of the systematic destruction of kavod haTorah engendered by the Peleg baryonim. The unthinkable has become possible! A yeshiva bachur can use the Gadol HaDor to create his stupid video to share with friends on Whatsapp. May Hashem have mercy on us all.

  6. Rabbosai, a few of you missed the boat on this one. This was likely set up, but certainly agreed upon by Rav Chaim. The bochur certainly did not pull off that old volume, probably a Chumash, off of Rav Chaim’s shelf to show him the Rashi where he quotes this CHaZa”L.

    The purpose was to tell all of Klall Yisroel to shorten their “list” and be aware that all one needs to know – about the brothers that is – is do they know how to learn. Not in which Yeshiva they learned. Not who they married. Not which camp they went to.

  7. He really needs to do teshua for treating the sar haTorah like his roommate…he should go back and realy ask for mechilla. He is playing with fire…

  8. He really needs to do teshua for treating the sar haTorah like his roommate…he should go back and realy ask for mechilla. He is playing with fire…

  9. rav elya’s talmid on the internet.
    for some reason you see this only on the peleg bnei brak side and never on the peleg yerushalmi side
    but ofcourse its the peleg yerushalmi’s fault! wow!

  10. Remembering Harav Shlomo Brevda zt”l on his 6th Yahrtzeit
    Thursday 26 Chodesh Teves (Jan 3rd ’19)

    Rav Brevda zt”l often mentioned in his Shiurim that one has to excel in the Midah of Hakoras Hatov, explaining that if a person is lacking in the Middah of Hakoras Hatov towards anyone that has done them a favor helped them etc. and they don’t show enough appreciation by expressing gratitude they are missing the essence of being a Yid.

    The Rav said that we find in Parshas Chayai Sorah that when Avrohom Avinu was negotiating with the Bnei Chase trying to purchase a burial plot the Meoras HaMachpelah for the burial of Sorah Imeinu he basically got the run-around, until they finally honored Avrohon Avinu as a great prince agreeing to hand over the burial plot of Avrohom Avinus choice for the burial of Sorah Imeinu. Right away in the next Posuk it states that Avrohom Avinu bowed down immediately to thank them.

    The Rav asked why couldn’t Avrohon Avinu wait until the entire transaction was completed to thank them? What was his rush to thank them in the middle of his negotiations? The Rav explained that when one receives a gift or a favor from a friend and they thank them on the spot it’s done with 100% of appreciation – HaKoras Hatov but the longer they wait, the lesser of a thank you will be given, and at times if it’s pushed off there won’t be any appreciation shown at all.

    Avrohom Avinu excelled in HaKoras Hatov so he thanked them IMMEDIATELY.

    Only then did Avrohom Avinu bury Sarah in the Meoras HaMachpelah.

    In line with the above mentioned thought it is worthwhile to note that immediately upon arising in the morning we say Modeh Ani thanking Hashem for giving us back our Neshoma. We say Modeh Ani even before washing Negel Vasser perhaps the reason is because if we were to push off expressing our gratitude to Hashem, with time we can forget to even thank Hashem at all.

    During Rav Brevdas lifetime he was always very careful after saying Modeh Ani in the morning to immediately wash Negel Vasser at his bedside before putting his feet down on the floor (as mentioned in Zohar Chadash 18). The Rav was always very scrupulous not to walk without washing Negel Vasser. Rav Brevda personally prepared his Negel Vasser near his bed before going to sleep at night (keeping it covered overnight) to ensure that he would immediately thank Hashem for returning his Neshoma in the morning and that right away be able to wash Negel Vasser in the proper way before placing his feet on the floor. (It is known that who ever washes Negel Vasser in the morning before placing their feet on the floor has a greater power to win over the Yetzer Hora that day)

    Since Rav Brevda zt”l spent his life giving to the public through his amazing shiurim giving advice and other acts of Chessed, it would be a gesture of appreciation to the Neshoma of the Rav, if peoplearound the globe can light a candle, give Tzedakah, do a Chessed, learn Torah/Mishnayos, and improve in the Middah of Hakaros Hatov, L’ilui Nishmas Reb Shoima Leib Ben Reb Moishe Yitzchok zt”l.

    Thank you Klall Yisroel !!!

    May he be a Malitz Yosher in Shamayim for all of Klall Yisroel and may his Neshama have an Aliya.


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