The Matzav Rant: The Root Cause


power-struggleBy Shmuel Miskin

In this post, I’d like to stay true to my intial goal when I introduced this column, and that is to make a brief and cogent point, providing food for thought to all you readers.

I believe that the cause of the power struggles that are plaguing our community might very well have the same root cause as many other problems within our community, including marital instability and difficulty in shidduchim, to name two. Perhaps we are sending the message, in many ways, that power, prestige and money are far more important and beneficial than klal and family togetherness and therefore make divisiveness worthwhile.

Unfortunately, some people grow up watching their fathers/relatives being respected and admired, almost to the point of idolization, due to their place in society. Children then feel this, crave it and find justification in fighting for it for themselves and others, when they see themselves as benefiting. The end result of such fighting is negative for all involved.

May the day come when the we is put before the me, and we see the total picture and reap far-reaching benefits.

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  1. What you’re saying is very subversive, that there could possibly be another cause to the shidduch crisis than the age gap!

    Actually, I agree with that. The age gap maybe a primary factor but the others can’t be discounted. I have to wonder if the gedolim are saying, we spent a whole generation encouraging the publication of beautiful books on marriage, shalom, middos and mental health, so many people have invested hours and hours on shiurim, travel, etc. to spread these ideas on a wider basis, and we’re still left with this.

    But then again, we’re still in galus. That means we haven’t learned our lesson.

    We have to start grass-roots, by modeling and concentrating on chinuch.

  2. Our communitiesmight want to consider treating ???? better and consider them seriously as marriage partners. I can’t begin to tell you the number of ???? I know who are rejected (hated) just because they are converts. Maybe if ???? had an easier time getting married, everyone else would as well.


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